It’s that time of year again. The judges from Village Voices are doing the rounds sussing out the best of the best of the crème de la crème of the Aussie blogging scene. I’m in the running thanks to the wonderful Ness of Boganville (http://nessofboganville.blogspot.com.au/) so I’m laying out the welcome mat in the form of some red carpet crumpet. Back in August 2012 I banged out a popular piece called Hollywood Hotties Dorkified (http://mum-abulous.com/2012/08/01/man-abulous-hollywood-hotties-dorkified/). Here I moaned about celebrity photographers’ knack for taking the sexiest men in the world and making them look like complete and utter knob ends. I promised a follow up and now is a great time to make good on my word.
As my devotion to the lotharios and ladies of Mad Men is well known I’ll begin with -
From the extensive research I’ve done on this subject I’ve come to the conclusion that Jon Hamm rolls out of bed in the morning looking like this.
There are so few photos of Jon looking anything but effortlessly sleek, sophisticated and stylish that one could easily assume he is missing the essential dork chromosome. This is about as bad as it gets for Jon. For a mere mortal a white Miami Vice suit and full facial fuzz would be a disaster. Its passable on Jon. Perhaps he is wearing his Superman undies beneath?
Imagine my shock and surprise when I stumbled upon this.
Before you utter OMG , WTF or any other text speak acronyms, its all in fun. Jon is channeling Sergio the Sexy Saxophonist for a Saturday Night Live skit. You’ve got to love a hunk with a sense of humour. The clip can be seen here: http://www.funnyordie.com/embed_videos/ee45ecea50/digital-short-the-curse. LOL, PML, ROLF, LMAFO.
Mumabulous does requests. Sarah from Slapdash Mamma ( http://slapdashmama.blogspot.com.au) asked for these two heart throbs. Slapdash is a rising star in the bloggy world and I wish to ingratiate myself with her before she becomes the next Mrs Woog. Therefore I happily present -
Phew, this was hard work she says wiping sweat from her brow. I was forced to look at this sort of thing for half an hour.
Oh my – a dark, brooding, dangerous bad boy. He’s putting the “dish” back in dishevelled here. I hope that’s not asprin in his glass because I for one don’t have a headache. Even with an over sized caterpillar on his upper lip Clive is very very tasty.
I was starting to think that Clive was un-dorkifiable until I spotted this advertisement for Lancome.
Really Clive – you’re too fine to be flogging stink water. You look like you’ve been sniffing a bit too much of your own hype in this one.
Slapdash also expressed an interest in -
Now this was fun. I was looking to punish Jude for his caddish ways be posting some uber dorky pictures. However as with Jon and Clive, the task proved difficult. Jude’s razor sharp bone structure and piercing china blue eyes (cliche much?) makes taking a bad photo of him close to impossible. Here he is channeling Johnny Cash in timeless Ray Ban Wayfarers at some miscellaneous red carpet event.
But I have some advice to give. If you’re going to wear turtle shell, limit it to your glasses frames please. This is NOT a good look on ANYONE.
This may not offend your eyes but I find it disconcertingly homo-erotic.
I can just imagine the photographic shoot. “Give me the bedroom eyes Jude”, “We need more sexy Jude”, “Look at the camera like you want to make love to it”. Jude’s “wistful” look can take its rightful place alongside Derek Zoolander’s “Blue Steel” and “Magnum”.
I know you’re all chomping at the bit for more and I’m glad to report that my crumpet account is in surplus. You’ll just have to wait for my next post. In the meantime if your husband comments about you looking at beefcake you can safely respond with “but Honey Jude Law looks like a total dweeb here. YOU could never look so undignified”. So there you have it – quality perving with an escape clause.
Who would you like to see given the Mumabulous dorkification treatment?