Shire Twits

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So Ok I’ve just had a rant about how Australia’s (and yours truly’s) birthplace is being so unfairly maligned of late. It was a cathartic experience and I feel so much lighter for it. Aaaaaah. Anyway I bet you are all dying to find out what I thought of the actually show. Having sat through the first half hour for “research” purposes (and because the princesses kicked me off the computer), I doubt I’ll be watching it again. Luckily I’m just not the target demographic ( as explained in my Upside to Middle Age Post). I do however have a few observations.

1) The show used more filler than Vernessa and Sophie’s lips. I can understand the incessant shots of hot young things on the beach but whats with all the footage of the Captain Cook and Tom Ugly’s bridges. Never before have bridges been used so gratutitously.

Man that’s one fine looking bridge.

2) Those two plastic fantastic barbie twins Vernessa and Sophie, were vaguely amusing for about 2 minutes but the endless preening got old quickly. Do they ever actually go out or do they just stand around discussing the size of their lips?

Another fine example of engineering


3) Rif Raf the rapper seemed out of place in the Shire, even in the glitzy ghettos of Sylvania Waters. Back in the day, rappers copped a heavy “dissing” from the “skegs”*. They were wittily referred to as “rapper crappers”. Rif Raf looked like he belonged 10 minutes up the road at Brighton Le Sands with the doof, doof boys in their fully sick hotted up Subaru WRX’s maaaaaate.

4) The spoilt rich kid who burnt through $15K on her father’s credit card in a month seemed an utter cartoon to me. This character is as fake as Vernessa and Sophie’s boobs.

5) The fragile strands of plot revolved around the romance between Mitch and ex-girlfriend Gabby. Will true love prevail? There was a scene where Gabby’s Mum says “you could search your whole life and never find the love and friendship you had with Mitch”. “Yeah”, I thought “or you could marry the dude and end up divorced with two kids by age 35′. Gabby honey, dont settle for one book when you can have the whole library. Go and travel, date men from all over the world, pursue your dreams. That would be my mumabulous advice.

Gaby’s soul-mate?

Now I’ve wasted enough neural connections on deconstructing last nights televisual feast. The outpouring on Twitter was by far more entertaining than the show itself. There’s comedy gold in this country and it glitters in 140 characters or less. Here’s some tasty samples;

Josh Taylor@joshgnosis

Showing this show overseas is really how we stop the boats #theshire

Mitch Lewis@Mitch_Lewis

“So which Shire character are you?” said no one, ever #TheShire

Dave Hughes@DHughesy

It’s hard to believe people from #theShire were capable of organizing a riot.

Marc Fennell@marcfennell

The botulism twins are both played by Chris Lilley, right #theshire

Brendan Maclean@macleanbrendan

Wow. Three seconds in and my television sprouted legs and threw itself off the balcony. #TheShire

Finally Mumabulous’ personal favourite, as it sums up my approach to the whole thing perfectly.

TweeVee TV@tweeveetv

#TheShire will be the new #QandA; hundreds of Twitter users vowing not to watch, but watching anyway in order to fuel their outrage.

Next Monday night it wont be to the TV remote that I’ll be racing but to the Twitter feeds instead. In the words of Forrest Gump “That’s all I have to say about that”.

Happy Tweeting


* Skeg – A 1980s term for surfers. I havent heard it in ages.

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