If you read as many blogs as I do you will have noticed that the interwebs has heralded spring with cascades of floral magnificence. Cyberspace is awash with enough gardening porn to make the late Alan Seale (Squeal) fist pump in his grave. I’m sure Peter Cundall goes all a quiver at the merest thought of logging on these days. Every second page I look at is plastered with glorious blooms and manicured lawns to make astro turf greener with envy. If the blogging world is any reflection of reality, Australians certainly know how to handle a hoe. We’re masters of manure and wield our garden hoses with Ninja like skill. As a result many of us are cocooned in the kind of splendor that is usually reserved for the Chelsea Flower Show.
If you are thinking I’ve got a dose of garden envy, you’d be right. As magnificent as Chez ‘Abulous is, it’s not The Palace of Versailles. Venturing out of our sliding glass doors my immediate thoughts are, the yard (just like my face ) could use some work. I even asked Dadabulous if I could have a boy to do the gardening, hoping to take advantage of the hordes of backpackers in our neighborhood. He acquiesced on condition that he could get a busty Swedish blonde to wash the car in her bikini. We remain locked in a stalemate. In the meantime the sprawling grounds of Chez ‘Abulous are in need of some Jamie Durie type magic. (No not Magic Mike magic – actual fair dinkum landscaping).
This is what greets us in the drive. The dandelion in full bloom is a cheery site. The kids love nothing more than to collect drooping bunches of them. They are hardy little blighters too – springing up from cracks in the concrete.
This luxurious foliage resides next to the garbage bin and camouflages the water meter. I dont know what they are but they’ve had a Lazarus style resurrection this Spring with out any input from me.
Lovely as all this is, its only a tantalizing entree to the real action out the back. However first we have the pleasant detour through the side passage. Why are side passages so rarely featured in those glossy home making magazines?
Our side passage features its very own herb patch. The chamomile (I think its chamomile) sprang up of its own accord.
The side corridor opens out to sweeping views of the clothes line and sumptuous outdoor dining area.
You’ll notice the detailing in the paving. It took a lot of time, effort and expense to get the weeds to come up through the cracks just so.
We couldn’t show you where Chez ‘Abulous entertains without high lighting Dadabulous’ pride and joy.
Doesn’t every spacious patio have a feature plant in a statement pot? This is ours. If you look closely you’ll notice that the cactus is nuturing a weed.
Things really get wild and adventurous in the lower terrace. This seat is on the periphery of the wilderness that I call the “corridor of death” due to its high concentration of spiders. I hate going in there to fetch errant balls. Dadabulous thinks I’m a wimp.
Being the environmentally sensitive drippy hippy people that we are we’ve dabbled in self sufficiency. We planted a crop of carrots but just like Team ‘Abulous they are vertically challenged.
We even produced a luscious crop of strawberries but the fruit was eaten by lizards – at least that is P2’s explanation.
Nevertheless if our attempt at organic produce fails we can always fall back on potpourri. We have lavender and we not afraid to stink like your grandmother’s smalls.
Finally if you are wondering how we manage to keep our gardens its charmingly unkempt state, I’ll let you in on a secret. We have the two best landscapers in town.
Is your yard space magazine worthy? Or are you ready to be featured in Blander Homes and Gardens.
Really I am thankful to have a yard space at all in this part of Sydney even if it is a little unkempt.