Why Do We Do This?


The other night when the girls were in bed I took a bath. This is an event so rare it is worth remarking on. Colin Firth was conspicuously absent. ( I refer you back to this gem so you’ll know what I’m talking about –https://mumabulous.wordpress.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=3696&action=edit).  However as I shared my hot tub with two mermaids, Kronosaurus, Albertosaurus and Stegosaurus, it was still quite a party.

My crew compensated for the lack of Colin Firth. Who am I kidding.

My crew compensated for the lack of Colin Firth. Who am I kidding?

Instead of abandoning myself to what should have been a luxurious thirty minutes of peace, I contemplated the unrighteousness of my abs. Forgive my bragging but back in the era when Krono, Alberto and Stego ruled the earth, I had a tummy like a table top. Nowadays my core is  comparable to a gentle hillock.  It is a grassy knoll which could conceal a mystery gun man.* I did a mental calculation and  concluded that I don’t have time to return to the gym. I should instead work with the fit ball in front of the television. Its a cunning plan. Sadly it has one major flaw – I don’t have time to watch the television.  I briefly toyed with a novel concept. If I stopped faffing I might be able to schedule a forty minute work out a couple of nights a week. I immediately shut down that thought.  Faffing is too much to sacrifice in the pursuit of fitness.  I metaphorically pressed “control”, “alt”, “delete” and reset my brain to its current default mode – ie. swinging between Fass and Hiddles.

The famed grassy knoll. Its slope resembles my stomach.

The famed grassy knoll. Its slope resembles my stomach.

I sprung out of bed the following morning and encountered Dadabulous who had already risen. Let me rephrase that. I used a mental crow bar to extract myself from the cosy flannelette sheets all the while muttering obscenities about the gross unfairness of having to get up and face the day again. As I lumbered zombie like towards the wardrobe Dadabulous surprised me by declaring “you look good”. That woke me up!
I instantly reverted to analyst-abulous mode, giving my poor husband  detailed reasons as to why he is wrong and I DO NOT look good. The expression on his face turned to the despair. Men just love reassuring us over every little fault in our appearance. It makes them feel masterful and priapic* – NOT.  This kind of behaviour is a complete drag so why do we insist upon doing it? Why can’t we just take a compliment graciously?

Firstly describing Dadabulous as a smart guy is the understatement of the year. To illustrate – he recently built a  spectrophotometer from its component pieces and coded it up. Admittedly he had help from an employee with a degree in mechatronics but still he’s the BOSS. The Springsteen of spectrophotometers.  If he can work out sensitive light measuring equipment, he can have a valid opinion of my wobbly bits. Secondly rather than being a point of contention, getting a compliment from my husband should bring about a fist pumping the air response.  I’m 42, with two kids and have been with the guy for nine years. If he still thinks I look good its a cause for celebration. He may be the only man on earth who feels this way but he’s the only man who needs to.

Does this sorry scenario play out at your abode? Can you take a compliment from your partner or do you argue the point? Why do we do this?

Vampires - another reason not to go to the gym.

Vampires – another reason not to go to the gym.



OK for those folk who sold their vote in the AWC competition in exchange for a tasty morsel of crumpet, I will do everything in my power to deliver  in time for IBOT. If I don’t manage this deadline, please  keep in mind that your crumpet will not be delayed as long as the NBN.  Naturally someone requested the Ryans – so here’s a little something to keep you going.  I don’t know about you but my economy gets overstimulated at this kind of talk. The RBA has to raise the cash rate to cool it down.

ryan - med

* A reference to theories surrounding President Kennedy’s assassination and an episode of Seinfeld.

* My favorite word after Annabel Crabb used it to describe Kevin Rudd.  Dictionary.com defines it as  – characterized by or emphasizing a phallus: priapic figurines, (of an image) suggestive of or resembling a phallus by its shape, exaggeratedly concerned with masculinity and male sexuality.


17 thoughts on “Why Do We Do This?

  1. Oh, I love that ‘vampire’ photo and Annabel Crabb, and yes, that suspiciousness of a compliment is incredibly frustrating isn’t it (why? because we can’t really enjoy it unless it’s ‘really real’? Gah! Yay for those hubbies who don’t give up.)

  2. I loved the photo of Colin Firth in the bath tub you tweeted me, drifted off after that reference.

  3. Bless Dadab. Do not argue with the man. He says you look good? Yu look good, dammit! I don’t argue because these are not words I’m familiar with hearing. I suspect I may do a PeppaPig and fall down should such words pass my eardrums, however.

  4. I blame it on several years of Dolly mag, followed by several years of Cleo and Cosmo, followed by several years of Vogue!

    To deal with this I have simply taken out a subscription to Home Beautiful and The Diggers Club… so now I focus on saggy tomato vines and bloated throw cushions!
    Does my lounge look fat in this colour???

  5. Great post. I hear myself saying the same stuff and frustrating myself as the words tumble out. Poor old husband rarely notices something like a haircut or new clothes at the best of times, and then when he finally comes to the party and gives positive feedback I cut him down. We are our own worst enemies!

  6. I’m with you, allergic to fitness!

  7. I am terrible at taking compliments too but am so thankful my hubby still loves me for who I am and not my abs.. or lack thereof 🙂 Great post!

  8. I am dead set obsessed with that photo of the backwards hanging yoga class. I seriously would pay good money for that. My shoulders and lower back are yearning for such a stretch. Also, I don’t know why we do it. The refusing compliments thing. Tis silly.

  9. I don’t even know what a spectrophotometer is. But building and coding one is a sure sign of intelligence to me! Take the compliment! Take it!

  10. Dave doesn’t often come right out and give compliments, a lot of it is non-verbal, but when he does give that verbal comment I know he genuinely means it and I am looking HOT! His next biggest compliment is the very enthusiastic raising of his eyebrows and widening of his eyes, it was awesome to see that very expression being given as I walked down the aisle in my bridesmaid dress back in March, feeling like a whale, he made me feel beautiful with nothing but a look!

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