If I were Yoda I would say things like
Yup – this really is me.
I’m not even interested in it from a crumpet perspective. I prefer men with necks and unsmushed faces. Moreover although I have absolutely no problem with brawn its brains I covet. For me when it comes to equations
If you are one of the thousands of footie fans out there I really don’t mean to “dis” your passion. Nor do I mean to imply that anyone who plays league is unintelligent, although getting thwacked around the head every weekend can’t be good for you. Let me explain my position. I was born and bred in Sydney’s Sutherland Shire which means a rusted on allegiance to the Cronulla sharks. Mention this to anyone outside the insular peninsula and their reaction is inevitably
To the district’s eternal shame the “mighty” Sharks have never won a premiership, are cursed by a “finals hoodoo” and have an uncanny knack of “snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.” They actually reached the grand final in 1978. I remember it clearly as it was a momentous occasion for my family and possibly the high light of my father’s life. Naturally we were crushed by the Manly sea eagles.
Nowadays Sharkies fans commiserate by circulating this sort of thing around social media.
As I have since escaped to the light side of the Georges River I could deny my past and start supporting the local team – the Eastern Suburbs Roosters. Yet my “Shireness” runs deep. I feel as though loyalty to the Sharks has been branded upon my very soul.
Its far far easier to feign complete disinterest. I’ve since reached a point where the disinterest is no longer feigned.
If you are part of the vast Australian middle class, you have probably spent many a child hood holiday in budget accommodation up and down our coastline. You are more than likely all too familiar with the local gift store and its plethora of tacky souveniers. Among the piles of shell jewellery
chances are you’ve encountered this fair dinkum Aussie bloke
I swear I have seen him at every seaside location I have ever visited in this country. He really gets around. What’s more he’s been baring those gluts for donkey’s years. Admittedly this guy is always grossly out numbered by cards featuring scantily clad Aussie sheilas but we’re not interested in that. The dude’s broad brim hat demonstrates a sensible approach to sun protection. I’m sure he remembers to slip, slop, slap – which would be an interesting event to witness. Meanwhile this adorable little fellow doesn’t need to given that his sun screen is built in and soft to touch. All Aussies know that koalas can really shred the tube.
This stuff really brings out the poet in me.
I love a sunburnt country
A land of naked rears
Of random surfing koalas
And roos chugging cold beers.
Are you a rusted on sports fan? What are your favorite kitschy souveniers? And which memes are you completely over?