If I Could Turn Back Time


You know the  saying “if you can remember the 1960s you weren’t there”?  I can’t remember the 1990s.  Its all a bit of a blur. All I have is snippets.  I do remember stumbling out of the Australian Hotel in the Rocks and performing my own interpretation of Cher’s iconic hit “If I Could Turn Back Time” on this very canon. Its just below the Harbor Bridge and despite having taken my weight it is still there. They made things to last in ye days of olde.

I sat on this canon and its still there!

I sat on this canon and its still there!

My companion at the time laughed with the kind of hilarity only several pints of boutique lager will induce.  That relationship only lasted about 6 months but if I could turn back time I would still have dated him (albeit briefly). I have trouble saying that about a handful of the others. Still every choice I’ve made either good – like buying my own unit, or bad like dating unsuitable individuals has led me to where I am now. Its a pretty good place. I wouldn’t want to mess with that.

If by any far-out, science fiction scenario I was bestowed with the power to turn back time I wouldn’t interfere with my own life. Instead I’d use the gift purely for entertainment purposes – like watching the Vikings in real time instead of on SBS.  Going back and visiting key moments in world history sounds way more exciting than a night in front of Big Brother.

Here are my top destinations in history.

The 1990s – I’d take a whirl wind tour through the decade to refresh my fading memory. There had to be more to the era than Dawsons Creek, Friends and NKOTB*. Right?

A friend of mine told me that back in the early 80s he was in a dingy night club in London when an unknown band called U2 took the stage and performed “Sunday Bloody Sunday” apparently for the first time. That strikes me as a moment worth visiting. Meanwhile the dude will dine out for the rest of his life on that anecdote – its one of the few anecdotes he has which is family friendly.

Whilst we’re on the topic of great performances – how about  Bowie’s Ziggy Stardust tour, The Rolling Stones circa 1972 or Sally Bowles at the Kit Kat Club in 1931? Ok – the last one is fictitious but it had to be based on something. Pre-war Berlin was quite the bohemian hawt spawt.

In 1972 Jagger had the moves like - well Jagger.

In 1972 Jagger had the moves like – well Jagger.


Berlin in the early 1930s - a hawt spawt of debauchery.

Berlin in the early 1930s – a hawt spawt of debauchery.

Neil Armstrong’s moon landing. The unadulterated awe the world felt when Neil took his “one small step for man” will never be matched.




I would love to have read Pride and Prejudice when it “first came out”. We’ve seen thousands of permutations of this story and its somewhat lost its edge.  Darcy however never loses his hawtness. Imagine how hawt he would have been in 1813.

Likewise seeing Hamlet performed for the first time at the Globe theatre in 1601. Prior to then no-one had ever asked “to be or not to be?”

It would be remiss to leave out great moments in visual art. I would love to visit Michaelangelo in his Florence studio and watch him create David. It would be a truly marvellous thing to see one of the world’s most iconic sculptures as a work in progress. Just kidding – that model is obviously smokin’ hawt!

Hawtest sculpture in history.

Hawtest sculpture in history.


November 22, 1963 Dallas Texas – the assassination of  President John F Kennedy. I want to settle the question of whether there really was a second gun man behind the grassy knoll.

and finally

My top choice for an historical photo-bombing opportunity – 2 June 1953 Queen Elizabeth 2’s coronation.

Epic photobombing. NB: In case you were wondering this is NOT me.

Epic photobombing. NB: In case you were wondering this is NOT me.


Do you ever ponder what you’d do if you could time travel? Would you change your own life? What moments in history would you like to photo-bomb?



* New Kids On The Block for those two young to remember or too old to care.

10 thoughts on “If I Could Turn Back Time

  1. I would love to do all of these things, history fascinates m. I would love to be around when dinosaurs were alive, but just for a minute or so, imagine seeing them in the flesh! Love me some Marky Mark

  2. I did see the moon landing and remember it vividly which is making me sound prehistoric. If I could turn back time I’d not accidentally bleach my hair orange when I was sixteen.

  3. I loved Dawsons Creek! I was a Joshua Jackson fan all the way. Until I saw his movie Shutter and it scared the living daylight out of me!! Moments in time that I would love to go back to is when Jesus was here. Would I have believed what he said or been apart of the crowd that thought he was a lunatic?

  4. There’s was definitely more to the 90s than Dawsons Creek, Friends and NKOTB…there was Melrose Place. 🙂

    I would *love* to have the chance to revisit various points in history. I would like to see Roman times. That time period fascinates me. And also to visit the really early days of various Australian colonies – to walk the streets before they became the streets we know today would be interesting. (Found you via the FYBF link up.)

  5. I studied history & classics at uni – yes, I’ve lost all cred now, haven’t I? I would love to go back into ancient history and see just how mad some of those crackpot Roman emperors like Nero and Caligula were. I’d love to have seen the Greek ships sail the Mediterranean and the Spartans “practice” fighting. There’s hotness right here Mumabs!

  6. For me I’d defo be going back for the music and possibly the drugs and free love: Hang out with the Grateful Dead in the Haight Ashbury in 1967. See Led Zeppelin, The Doors, Jimmy Hendrix live. Party with New Order in Manchester at The Hacienda in the 80s. See Nirvana live in the 90s. Oh and Jeff Buckley. There’s so many more!

  7. Eeek! Your site just took me to Adult Friend Finder! That’s not normal, right?!
    Loved this post, I’d love to go back and see if I could change a thing or two… 🙂

  8. oh if only I could turn back time….I would have been smarter with money! And buy LOTS of investment properties 😉
    And had way more children….wished we had at least 12 of them instead of five!!!
    And eat healthier so that my body wouldn’t be such a mess now
    And laughed more!
    And slept more!!!
    Actually I am pretty happy with my life choices 🙂
    But I would love to have been able to see the “Cave Men” stage – imagine how brave those people would have been 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s