Celebrity narcissism (or in Kim Kardashian’s case arsisssism) knows no bounds. It isn’t enough that they inflict their oiled up backsides on our social media feeds, dress us in their signature clothing lines and parade the minutiae of their lives as reality TV? Apparently it’s not. They want us to smell like them too.
It seems like all the listers from A to Z have their own perfume. According to Wikipedia (yes someone had enough time to collate a Wiki page on this) Brittany Spears has lent her name to 16 different fragrances. That ought to keep K-Feds bank balance smelling sweet. Antonio Banderas ( the latino crumpet which I rank as my daggiest crush but – that’s a whole other blog post) has a collection of colones under the “Seduction” banner. The marketing campaign for Seduction is laughably cheesy. Just imagine Derek Zoolander advertising “Blue Steel” aftershave and you get the picture. Actually don’t bother imaging it – I’ll give you the picture.
Here’s our hero seducing none other than Angelina Jolie with his big blue splash. To my mind the connotations are quite obscene. (If they are not to your mind why are you reading this blog? You are not filthy enough. Click away).
At the other end of the spectrum One Direction have two signature scents – Our Moment & You and I. Doubtless 1D could sell anything from toilet paper to tax returns but seriously who would want to smell like five barely pubescent boys on a hormonal rampage? P-eeeeeew!
The fragrance that really puzzles me comes from that marketing behemoth some people know as The Beckhams. Dave and Vic’s “Intimately” line is quite the turn off for this cougar.
I have decided to get in on all this celebrity stink action. You may not have guessed but there’s a marketing genius inside of me (he looks like Don Draper – HONK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and he’s just busted loose all over Photoshop CS6. With no further ado I present Mumabulous’ new range of male celebrity fragrances just in time for Christmas.
If you’re going to lower the tone of the political debate you may as well be non-partisian about it.
And finally as his existence in the Parliament stinks its natural that Clive Palmer should bottle his own odor.
Why the PR agencies aren’t knocking my door down in a frenzy I will never know.
Celebrity scents – do you own any?
Who do you think would make a great fragrance ambassador?
Which celebrity do you want to smell?