What I’ve Learned From TV

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This week I am leaning heavily on one of my all time favorite bloggers – the wonderful Lydia C Lee of Where The Wild Things Were.  Lydia often reviews movies with reference to what they have to teach us. For one of those irritating people who rarely watch TV , I am somewhat obsessed with it at the moment. Here are a few things I have garnered from the experience.

Mad Men

As the final season draws rapidly to a close we are all awaiting the outcome with baited breath. Just what will become Don Draper, the tortured Madison Ave lothario, as everything he holds dear dissolves around him? Will Roger get rid of the pornstache (however appropriate it might be)? On this theme – whose gosh darn idea was it to put facial fungus on the gorgeous Ted Cheough? The only team member rocking the 1970s hirsute trend is Stan Rizzo – which brings me to the endgame I’m coveting. I really want to see Stan the man take Peggy in his ever loving arms! You know you want it Peggy! There’s something primal about that dude. Sure he is an arsehole but he’s less of an arsehole than he was at the beginning of the series. OK – its coming off a low base but my point is that Stan has developed a modicum of sensitivity unlike some of the others.

What will become of the gang?

What will become of the gang?

So what have I learned from eight seasons of Mad Men:

1) You need to rethink the outdated notion that corporate success is related to hard work. To scale the corporate ladder you really must spend your days lying about on your office couch sinking booze from your private stash.

11am? Booze o'clock.

11am? Booze o’clock.

2) Toking on joints enhances the creative process. Experiments with speed are worthwhile in terms of productivity.

3) Shagging your co-workers is unprofessional. Such behaviour will cast you in a bad light. Just kidding! You should root as many of your team as you can possibly fit into your schedule, particularly if you are married. Extra bonus points will be awarded for knocking up a colleague and not claiming responsibility.

Pete knocks up Peggy in Season One.

Pete knocks up Peggy in Season One.

The experience doesn't put her off married men.

The experience doesn’t put her off married men.

but she should be with Stan.

Stan is the one who loves her.

NOT DON!

NOT DON!

4) Bringing a ride on mower into the office will not end well.

5) Joan is a multi-dimensional character and her dimensions are out of this world! Boom-Tish!

6) Never do lunch with Harry Crane, don’t mess with Kenny Cosgrove and NEVER EVER under any circumstances accept a coffee from Bob Benson.

Roger channels Colonel Sanders.

Roger channels Colonel Sanders.

Vikings

If there is anything missing from the Australian Mummy blogging scene, its a thorough analysis of the smorgasbord of hunks intense historical drama that is the Vikings. Lets have a little less Thermomix and a a little more Ragnar. I’ll get things started.

1) Perhaps Ragnar’s Gods and Athelstan’s God can be friends. Meanwhile there’s a bromance that makes me go “Oh My God!”

TVs hawtest bromance.

TVs hawtest bromance.

2) When the ice melts in the fjord we will go raiding.

3) If a mysterious vagrant with ripped abs wanders into your village while your husband is away, it is most probably Odin and you should definitely shag him.

4) When you are attempting to breach the walls of medieval Paris wearing a shirt is in fact a hindrance.

Shirts are for wimps

Shirts are for wimps

5) Lagertha – more like Shagertha. Double thumbs from me – you go girl. If the hawt but dastardly King of Wessex gives you a plough you really should let him furrow your fields as it were. Meanwhile if a young upstart betrays you and steals your earldom you should certainly shag him too, particularly if he is hawt (and that goes without saying for this show).

What do you do when your underlying steals your job? Depends how hawt he is.

Q: What do you do when your underlying steals your job? A: Depends how hawt he is.

 

6) Bjorn Ironside cops two arrows in the back and returns to pristine health within a few hours. However Khal Drogo dies of a flesh wound. Ooops -I’m getting my shows mixed up.

7) Lock up your princesses. A princess can’t so much as look at a Viking without falling pregnant.

Gisla cops a perve at Rollo.

Princess Gisla cops a perve at Rollo.

8) Princess Gisla – we could not help but notice the way you gazed lustily at Rollo as he shirtlessly breached your city walls swinging his mighty axe. Can’t say that I blame you – if someone has to breach your walls it may as well be a shirtless hunk with a mighty axe.  However there’s a dangerous precedent here – you are almost certainly pregnant.

Poldark

This one has the interwebs divided. Some are relishing the high camp and melodrama while others are simply unmoved. Of course I am weighing in in favor.

1) I can’t resist men in britches. I hope to see a britches revival on the catwalks of Europe soon. Any takers? How about you Dolce and Gabbana?

2) If you are going to brood you can’t do it half heartedly. You have to brood hard or go home. No one nowadays broods as hard or as darkly as Aiden Turner.  In fact I believe Aiden’s efforts are comparable to the quintessential brooder – Colin Firth’s legendary Mr Darcy.  However Colin had the edge because he always managed to look constipated.  Aiden isn’t quite there yet. Perhaps he needs to skip his All-bran for the sake of method acting.

brooding

There’s some high quality brooding right there.

 

3) If you feel the need to cop a perve at your boss, I recommend hiding behind the bushes whilst he skinny dips. As I am married to my boss this advice is somewhat redundant.

4) In order to look suitably dashing whilst commuting up and down the Cornish coast, I advise mounting a mighty stead. A black one of course.

5) The Warleggans – proving that bankers have been bastards since 1783.

6) Frances Poldark is an unappealing wuss bag but the actor who plays him is  a total honey bunny in real life.

Kyle Soller - not my type at all. Just kidding! Yet another red headed English man.

Kyle Soller – not my type at all. Just kidding! Yet another red headed English man.

7) When you are clearing your fields with your mighty scythe wearing a shirt is in fact a hindrance.

I repeat - shirts are for wimps.

I repeat – shirts are for wimps.

8) Its a total waste of luxurious long curly dark tresses if they are not constantly wind swept – God Damn it.

Permanently windswept

Permanently windswept

To be continued…

What have you been watching? Any fellow Mad Meniacs out there – how would you like it to end?

Love

Mumabulous

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

15 thoughts on “What I’ve Learned From TV

  1. I love the new Poldark. Admittedly the leads just look hot whilst the people around them (ie the non-hot ones) do the hard work. But that’s the way a lot of workplaces function. And, in Ross and Demelza’s defence, it’s hard not to have windswept hair when you have to ride your horse along a Cornish cliff four times an episode. Why didn’t the authorities build some roads inland?

  2. I love Mad Men so much and am literally about to start the last season. I don’t want it to end! Frankly, I can’t even imagine how it will end. I hope that Peggy and Joan are happy and still kicking arse. And I hope that Roger is still alive. He is one of the funniest and best characters of all time. And HAWT. I’d be interested in your thoughts on that Mumabs? Is Roger hot?

  3. Mad Men- I’ve never watched it! I’m so ashamed! However, I’ve lurved Aiden since he was a broody vampire *drools*

  4. I totally support the more Vikings on Mummy Blogs!

  5. I’ve not watched Poldark or Vikings, but I regret the latter. I hear such good things about it. (I must borrow the DVDs and catch up!)

  6. I haven;t heard of Poldark, must go look that up, but Vikings is a must watch!

  7. Total Mad Meniac! Off to watch the latest epi on Apple TV! I reckon Don dies of a broken lonely heart. Or is that too cliche???

  8. I’m already in a state of mourning, don’t want Mad Men to end. I think Don will keep heading west Kerouac style, bumming rides and sandwiches, til he gets to California. I want a good ending for Peggy too

    • As much as I want Stan and Peggy to get together I dont think it will happen – Matt Weiner is an a$$hole like that. Anyhow I do thought that Don would drift back to Southern California and reinvent himself there. Now that Betty is dying he has to go back to NY for the kids. He hasn’t also been FOTY material but he does love his children. Meanwhile I am kind of happy that the rotten Pete Campbell redeemed himself.

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